Being a mum with a baby and a toddler is a wonderful gift but it’s not without its challenges. Lately I’ve been finding some routine things difficult and have often chosen to not do some things because the effort out weighs the benefit.
This is something I have ranted about before but seriously in Australia we need more pay at bowser petrol stations. What should be a quick convenient service turns into a nightmare when you need to take two kids out of their car seats into the shop to pay and then load them back in the car. Now I know some people leave them in there but I just can’t do it. On a super hot day the idea of them sitting out there even for a few minutes send my anxiety into overdrive!
Running out of milk is a nightmare. Again getting two kids in the car to the shops, setting up the pram, buying the milk, loading them back in the car, driving home, unloading them from the car all for the sake of 2L of Milk is such a mammoth effort. For the sake of mums could someone please invest in me opening a drive thru deli store???
Keeping your family safe not the road should not be hard! I booked my car in recently and asked for a courtesy car. Apparently courtesy cars were books out for the next 3 months. There was not shuttle service available either. So what do you do with two kids. Sitting at the service centre for 6 hours isn’t an option. Long story short I had to ask my mum to help me. She met me at the mechanics at 8:30am , where I uninstalled two car seats and installed them in her car. We all then got in her car and went back to my house. There we sat and waited for hours upon hours. The mechanic rang me to say I needed new tyres to which I approved and he said the car would be ready at 12. At 2 I rang to see what was happening and he apologised that he’d put it on the later pile and it wouldn’t be ready until 4. At 4 I rang and was told I could get the car at 4:30pm. We headed off to pick the car up, after paying I took the car seats out of mums car and reinstalled them in mine. By the time I got home it was dinner time, everyone was grumpy because we’d been stuck inside all day. Dinner wasn’t cooked, and I just can’t help but think that there has to be a more family friendly way to get this done.
Having your two kids tag along to your medical appointments is a nightmare. My 2.5 year old cries if anyone touches me, apparently the chiropractic table is going to kill me, and don’t even try checking my ears. These appointments need to happen, they’re a fact of life, and part of taking care of ourselves. But going on your own with kids is tricky there’s no easy way about it.
Why are these always scheduled in the middle of the day during nap time! The kids fall asleep in the car, your loading and unloading them between houses, or you have to enlist a babysitter to watch them just so you can spend 10-15 minutes wandering around houses..so frustrating
For many Christmas Week in general is basically event hoping and for many of us, myself included it is actually one of the most stressful times of the year. Not only is it the financial stress of Christmas but the emotional toll it takes. I spend the week trying to make Christmas amazing for everyone else, decorating, baking, going to each and every events so as not to upset anyone, ensuring we’ve visited those that are lonelier over the holidays and last year with a toddler it was a strain. This year I’ve got to do it with a newborn as well, send some serious help!
A few years ago though one vital decision was made by my in-laws which did reduce the stress of Christmas week significantly. For a while when I first started dating my husband I was the only partner therefore there were no considerations for the fact that we would have to try and be in two places at once on Christmas Day and man the stress. I felt like I was letting everyone down, I was clock watching the entire day and I was not enjoying myself at all. Just thinking about it gives me grey hairs. Luckily a few more partners came on the scene and they weren’t as people pleasing as me. They just said they couldn’t go to the in-laws event because their families was on at the same time. Now why didn’t I have the guts to do that…anyhow’s, the in-laws made the decision to have their Christmas lunch on Boxing Day so that the majority could be there and my and my husband rejoiced. For the first time in years we could relax on Christmas Day without the worry of rushing off somewhere else.
Fast forward a few years and the in-laws asked us to host the Boxing Day lunch..worst decision ever! Now although we didn’t have to rush off on Christmas Day I had no time to prepare for Boxing Day. After enjoying my Christmas lunch I had to come home and spend all evening prepping, cleaning and setting up. Needless to say there was no repeat of us hosting the year after. Now with two kids under three there is no hosting in sight!
This year brings new challenges- nap time. Navigating naps at different peoples houses around present opening and such is super tricky. Do I put them down early at home and wake them if they sleep too long? Do I risk it and take them awake and hope they go down for a nap there? Do I make everyone work around our schedule regardless of the fact that lunch would then be served at 2pm? There is an argument here for hosting it..but trying to cook for 15 people with a newborn and a toddler really isn’t realistic. I think I’m going to do a mixture of options. For Christmas at my parents the kids are used to sleeping there so I’m going to put them down for naps there between preset opening and lunch. For the in-laws I’m going to put them down for naps early at my house then take them there when they wake up. There would be nothing worse then over tired kids at the in-laws. Plus afterwards we have another event to drop in at so they need to have had a good rest.
In terms of baking and preparing plates to take to each event this is going to be done Christmas Eve Day. That way I am doing no cooking or cleaning on Christmas Day itself. If I can buy it I’m doing it. I know as a mum I’m acting as Santa and Christmas is about the kids so I will be running around like a headless chook trying to make it perfect for them but I have made one condition with my husband. One day Christmas will be all about me. Selfish as it may seem I would like one Christmas in my life before I have daughter in-laws and grandkids where I get to relax and have the Christmas I’ve dreamt of from the holiday movies. When the kids are old enough we’re going away for Christmas. I just want one Christmas in my lifetime that is a white Christmas maybe Germany I don’t know and if we win lotto a Hawaiian Christmas too. We will stay in a nice apartment, we’ll do Christmas presents on Christmas morning, we’ll eat at restaurants and there will be no people pleasing and that Christmas will be all about me. It’ll be just about my immediate family, building memories where no one is stuck in a kitchen. Where I can have as many drinks as I like because no one has to drive, and I can have a nap whenever I feel like it. That’s the dream, let’s hope Covid and my bank balance allow it one day!